You know you are a Peace Corps Trainee in Guyana when…

You wake up to the sound of the local dog gang dueling with the neighboring village’s dog gang (this sound can be compared to loud barking). For further information on these gangs, refer to the dogs’ pack leader, Tarzan.

You eat spicy chick peas (cheno) for breakfast on a regular basis. That of course is on the days you aren’t eating fish.

You get bit by at least twenty mosquitoes before you leave the house in the morning.

You spend an afternoon training session devoted to diarrhea, which might entail singing a song about the preventative measures to avoid it.

You ride a minibus packed with 30 plus people.

You begin to decipher Creolese as your host family recounts all the American oddities you embody, such as turning red in the sun.

You ask for juice and get an odd mixture of flat cola mixed with a mystery substance.

You no longer notice the curry smell that has become our staple spice/food.

You spend your lunch break playing cricket with a stress ball.

You sleep-in time on the weekend is 7 am.

You go to bed with wet hair from your shower, and when you wake up in the morning your hair is still wet (oh humidity)

You get “sipped at” on your way to the internet café (this is a kissing noise equivalent to the American cat call)

You hear the answer “just now” as an answer for question of when things will happen. For instance, when is dinner? Answer: just now. When are we leaving? Answer: just now. What exactly does just now mean. It means whenever the heck that person feels like doing what you asked. Anywhere from a minute away to several hours time. When will I update my blog again? Answer: just now.

Your daily budget for training is 3 American dollars (600 Guyanese dollars).

You notice that Celine Dion is indeed making a comeback overseas; I actually can't tell if she ever went out of style here.

You can buy the King's Speech on DVD because there are no copyright laws.

You can tell what trainees participated in the festivities of Mashramani based on how much glitter is on them the following day.

You notice that people use umbrellas to block the sun instead of the rain.

You see a mosque, a mandir, and a church all within a five minute walk.

You lost 20 Guyanese dollars betting on when a fellow trainee will correct her "regulatory" issue...if you know what I mean.

I'm still intact

The Peace Corps packs quite a bit into one week. There was the hotel arrest, a boot camp, and an adoption. Let me explain. In order to prevent us from mistakenly happening upon the “Red Zones,” the Peace Corps staff mandated that we stay in the hotel for our own safety as we started our first training sessions. Hence, “hotel arrest.” We had luxuries galore, including blessed air conditioning, so we didn’t complain.

As for the boot camp, we had to endure the most rigorous collection of swimming tests: front stroke, floating on our backs while wearing a life jacket, and paddling a kayak to a buoy approximately forty feet from the shore. Obviously we have quite a group of athletes because everyone passed.

The adoption came last on Friday, when our group was split up. Of the 37 trainees in Guyana group 23, 12 went to a rural location for training while the remaining 25 of us ventured to an urban location, West Demerara. Once we arrived at West Demerara, we herded ourselves into our training building to meet our prospective host families. We will be boarding, eating, walking, and generally learning the Guyanese way of life from these families for the next 9 weeks.

Essentially we are their shadow. However, I discovered that I gained a couple of shadows of my own since I arrived at my house. Their names are Mark, Jennifer, Daniel, Elizabeth, and Gabriel. If I signed up for the Peace Corps as a test-run of having children, I would certainly be getting my money’s worth. Curiosity certainly is their strongest attribute. At church today, I believed I had become a conjoined twin because of the intimate proximity of little Elizabeth next to me.

On a different note, within two days I attended two wakes and one memorial service in Guyana, which is more than I ever went to in America. At the memorial service a boy was video recording, and I couldn’t help but think that people watching it later might wonder: “What the heck is that white girl doing there?”

In the meantime, I think I discovered the first bug I am allergic to. As I write, I have about ten bites on my leg, and I am watching them increase in size. How long should I hold off before I take the Benadryl? It might get me out of going to a group meeting at church tonight.

Now it is time for the weekly highlights; the focus this week is food:
Most interesting food I have eaten: Chicken liver (oddly enough—it does not taste like chicken)
Most challenging meal to eat without gagging: Fish for breakfast—Fish still tastes fishy at 9 o’clock in the morning
Most delicious meal: Can’t beat pancakes for breakfast!
Advice when looking for sugar: Don’t listen to what the four year old identifies as sugar or you will be choking down tea that has a mystery clumps that are definitely not sugar
Most exciting fruit discovery: Hannah, they have star fruit. Except they call it “Five Finger” fruit